Writing about past hurt.
How to write about individuals who may have hurt you in the past?
Hello everyone, this is Ebony Harris. As most of you know, I am an author, publisher, and writing coach. Today I want to talk to you on a subject that should get a lot of consideration, especially if you plan on writing about people who may have hurt you in the past. How do you introduce them into your book? Do you talk about them for what they may have done? What do you say? Do you sugarcoat things? What do you say? How do you talk about them in your book?
The first thing I'll mention, which you may have heard me say in the past, is, "We don't intentionally try to harm people with our writing." If you desire individuals to feel your pain and cry with you, and hate the individual with you, a memoir is not the place for that. When we write, our readers can pick up our feelings and words because words are spirits. Yes, that is true even if it is written. If you are dealing with a situation that is still hurting you, you need to heal. My advice to you is to get healing first. Our mental health is much more important than a book. Words written or spoken out of season can give our readers/listeners an unwanted image of who we are.
Should I stop writing if I haven't healed? No. Many keep writing journals to journal their feelings during difficult times in life. Writing is therapy. It helps. What happens in most cases when a person starts writing a book, they look for the juicy things to keep readers engaged. The truth is positivity can do the same thing. If you want to keep a journal, a regular lined journal will be fine, or maybe you need a guided journal that will give you space to talk about your day and keep you looking at the good things that happened during your day.
Your writing is a ministry, and we don't minister from a place of hurt that spreads more pain. When we write from a place of healing, our readers can, in turn, receive healing from the words we speak. I hope you caught that. Our words can bring healing when we are healed. Listen, we are not seeking victory. The Bible declares that we already have it. The issue is many of us have walked with a defeated mindset so long that they fight for what they only have to start walking in. We want our words to be edifying to the individuals who read our books.
So the question is, how do you introduce individuals into our books who have hurt us in the past? We present them like any other character telling the good and bad instead of painting a one-sided picture. Make sure you have a well-rounded character. If the issues you discuss in your book are hard to deal with, offer some help on how you deal with them. Don't just tell a story that leaves a trail of pain. Leave solutions.
Make sure everything you say is accurate, don't embellish. Tell the truth. If you tell a lie that can affect an individual's income, you can be sued for the lie. We always want to be truthful and considerate even of the people who hurt us. Why because we are different, and we are called to stand out. I know they hurt you, but you can choose not to spread pain, choose love and let the trail of pain stop with you.
They have a saying, "You can't teach an old dog new tricks." Now, let's think about this thing. As long as you are living and your mind is functioning correctly, you can change. That goes double to the person who has trust in Jesus and more so to the spirit-filled individuals. The Holy Ghost is more than a comforter. He's also a helper. We can do so much more if we trust in God and not ourselves. I'm not saying that it's easy, but that it is possible.
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